inside the wonderful world of vee

december 23rd — first day.
i headed from seattle to las vegas to meet up with my family. got there and went to bellagio hotel to eat a meal with my brother and his girlfriend roxanne while my parents went to this meeting that tried to sell them a timeshare — cause that’s how we got the room in the first place. let me tell you that vegas is a shithole. i am not at all a fan of the place.bellagio cafe meal was subpar and unexciting. i was not impressed. it was expensive, too. afterwards, lord knows what we did, since it was all a blur of walking around on the strip not accomplishing much.

that night we went to go see “mamma mia!” at one of the hotels. it was good. abba. upbeat. very many sexual references. it was goot. not much else to say.

vegas is such a shithole, as i will say again. nothing much to do there but spend money. deja vu. hmm. anyway, its routine goes something like this: gamble, spend money, shop, spend money, rent expensive hotel, spend money, watch shows, spend money, eat expensive and gross meals, spend money, plane tickets, spend money. that sounds about right. the only thing that is kind of worth it is the shows, but even those felt not so exciting this time…

it must be the nature of family vacations that sucks all the joy out of vacationing.
december 24th — second day.
we woke up around noonish and drove half an hour to outlets. spent two hours there. i bought some underpants cause they were cheap and cheap boyshorts are kinda hard to find. also got a skinny tie for lenny (totally cheapo), a pair of crappy nikes so that i can walk around (but they’re so fscking ugly), dippin dots (banana of course), and a t-shirt (which is totally a homage to shrooms!!).

soo… then we left and drove back and waited in line for buffet, but halfway through that line, dad decides he doesn’t want to wait. we’d waited an hour. probably another hour to go. so we leave and go to another restaurant and wait for a half hour, and that line doesn’t move at ALL. so we leave and then go to cafe bellagio (which we went to the previous day), and the line moves faster, except by the time we finished waiting there we’d probably have been in the buffet already. so i was pissed. especially since cafe bellagio or bellagio cafe or whatever the fuck is expensive and NOT GOOD. i got this alaskan salmon burger and it was sick. blahblah.

went to m&m store after that and gameworks a bit to kill time. i pwnz0red in tekken 5. wewt.

then we went back to bellagio to watch “o”. it was good. but not as good as “varekai” which lenny and i saw last year. “o”’s primary thing is that it revolves around water, but there wasn’t really a discernable storyline, and on top of that, the acrobatics were poorer and many times were off sync. the music and costumes were worse too. they also dragged “staged” audience members on stage, which made the whole event livelier, but also cheapened the overall feeling. as with “varekai,” they had clowns do intermissions, but these clowns were not funny. AT ALL. it was pathetic. varekai was sOoOoo much better. i really don’t understand at all why “o” is so famous. on the flipside, though, the stage for “o” was really really fscking cool, but in all honesty, that was all it really had going for it.

after that we went to circus circus for a bit and gambled minimally (slot machines). gambling is lame. money goes away so fast. whatever.

when we got back, i gave parentals my present to them. i painted them some abstract concoction on a wooden block. granted, i’m not the best painter, but if your kid makes something — or if anyone makes something for you — you should appreciate it. at least a little. last year i made the a collage of family photographs and they feigned interest, but i came back a year later and it was just sitting in its frame on the floor, collecting dust. no time to display it — not even to put it on a bookshelf or something. this is the shit my family is like. i am such a black sheep.

but anyway, this year, i handed them their present and i jokingly said, “here’s my crappy present,” and my dad was like (also jokingly i think), “what kind of crappy thing did you make us now?” and i just kind of nudged it forward. they picked it up, brought it in their room, and didn’t say a fucking thing. i told them they sucked. they didn’t seem to notice and/or care.

moving on, though… cause it gets worse.

december 25th — day three.
the day to head back. airport, airport, airport. not much else. after coming back from the airport, we went to fremont to eat at ophelia. beef stew noodles. good, decent, whatever. here’s where it gets bad. conversation:

assholes. seriously, i have no real qualms about saying, “worst parents ever,” cause that’s so fucking fucked up. what the fuck is wrong with us.

the one funny thing about this trip is that my mom would not fucking stop bitching about fucking EVERYTHING. and my dad kept saying in this weird accent and making sure to only use english: “yes, commander!” and “thank you!” dad can be pretty funny. blahr. SO MUCH BITCHING FROM MOM. that must be where i get it from. fucking suck.

KILL ME NOW.

listening to — “soul train” on tv hahahah.

1:35 am — let me tell you, dudes and dudettes… there is nothing like old school “soul train”. the shit fucking rocks your pants off. reminds me of the times when i used to go to sleep listening to javier the xman on wild 94.9 haha. man, he was awesome. but then he left. to go to los angeles because of some internal crap. and i was sad. i even wrote him an e-mail saying, “sorry to see you go, your show is the best, blahblahblah”… it was a show that played nothing but slow jamz and my gawt it was awesome. so i stopped listening to 94.9 as much, and eventually javier came back, so i should start listening to it again

but now the doghouse has left as well… so old 94.9 just isn’t so good anymore

so yeah i haven’t made much tangible art stuff lately, but yesterday i went to the downtown seattle art walk (first thursday of every month, all the galleries are open for perusal), and it was umm, inspiring? in a way? i guess? this has always been my theory — that artists just need to be confident in themselves. lots of artists do things that i could do, but i would never think of pawning it off as art, would never think it is good enough for people to own or to love. and i guess that’s the major difference — that those people really believe in their own work. so i’m thinking… i could probably do that. i really wish i had gone to art school, but it’s a little too late for that now (is it?)

instead, i’ve been trying to reclaim whatever minimal art skill i have (at least in the fine arts) and trying to make physical manifestations of things. we’ll see how that goes. i actually drew something today that i like, but i kind of screwed it up when i was trying to overlay it with paper (hard to explain). but now i guess i will just transfer it and make it smaller and paint it…? lenny bought a pack of 3 canvasses — one for me, one for him, and one for andy [crossett], so that we can each paint a painting for our apartment. we’ll see when that happens.

saw death cab for cutie tonight @ key arena. it really wasn’t that exciting, to be honest. they’re not very good live. i think i will be forever satisfied with having seen them once. the decemberists, on the other hand, were about 10,000 times better. i’m pretty sure guns n’ roses, who i’m seeing tomorrow, will also be a ton better. also playing with death cab tonight was jenny lewis & the watson twins (the watson twins were sOoOo lame) and ted leo and the pharmacists, but unfortunately i missed them. sadddddfaceeee.

saw mel gibson’s movie, “apocalypto”, yesterday. it was entertaining. i wouldn’t say good, and his action fighting sequences were fucking terrible as hell (terrible camerawork), but the movie itself was entertaining because it was… funny. people say it’s gory, but the way people died was just funny — kind of like how people died in “a history of violence” — bad in real life, funny in the movies. perhaps that is a terrible thing. but unfortunately, i still find it funny.

couple days ago i put together a 1 hour showcase for some people from new york who were “trend finders”, and they had this lady named susan, who was convinced that seattle was a new hotspot. so i had to find two bands for her, and have them each play a half hour or so, and then do a q&a afterwards. it went well. had john [gillanders]’ band play and this other guy’s band, who i got off craig’s list. they’re called the GIANT KILLER ROBOTS! the guy helped me find a venue too, which was very nice. $250 pay for it. wewt.

i remember random strangers used to always find my journal through search engines. wonder if they still do.

listening to — this show on ABC.

i’m watching this show on ABC and they put people in this weird ass situations like if you’re in a restaurant and there’s loud ass people… or if u get into a cab and the cab driver starts being all homophobic what you would do. lenny and andy [crossett] are adamant in saying they dont know what they would do. but i dont have any doubt what i would do in either of those situations and i guess i am curious as to why other people dont know. is it cause they dont know themselves? or do they really think fate is that much bigger than they are? or is it something else?

in the case of the homophobia, i’d say something in a fucking second. in the case of loud people, i really don’t give a damn. had it happen before, and it’s all gravy. makes for interesting eavesdropping material, anyway. i love to eavesdrop.

listening to — head automatica, something corporate.

i never get to write anymore. it kind of fucking sucks. the justification is kind of like this: i feel like i’m better (or have more potential) at graphics, and therefore i expend more energy towards that. writing… it just seems like the words i write and the things i think are just recycled unless i am writing a journal entry. but when i’m writing an article or something of that sort… it’s always the same words, the same format, the same lack of inspiration. therefore, i haven’t spent much time on writing. there just isn’t much to say that hasn’t been said, i guess? and with all of the things on the graphics front and the life front that i need to spend time learning, why bother, it seems… but i find that when i don’t write, things feel pretty off. it’s probably the only way that i can truly express myself, whether people read it or not. but i don’t feel comfortable writing in a journal when other people are around, so i just don’t write in it as much anymore. there are a lot more distractions these days — a lot more things to keep me from really sitting down and just writing down each day. it kind of feels just pointless. i don’t know why, though… why wasn’t it pointless before and why is it pointless now? certainly not THAT much has changed, has it?

perhaps it has…

i’ve seen the new darren aronofsky movie, “the fountain,” a couple times in the past month. it’s amazing… to me, anyway. amazing that he can craft such a movie, although there are a lot of haters. ebert and roeper (fuck those bitches) said it was “one of the worst movies of the year,” which, even if you fucking hate the premise, could not be true if you look at just the visuals and the music… the music is amazing. the visuals are unique. maybe some people think the story is a load of bullshit, but whatever. but definitely a lot of people seem to not like it… because afterwards outside of theatres you see people talking about how much they hated it. but mostly i think it’s because they don’t understand it. but who knows.

i’ve also gotten back into music, somewhat. for a while i was definitely burnt out on music — so burnt out that i didn’t really want to listen to it at all. it just all seemed — once again — so fucking pointless. why was i expending this energy to write about bands who barely even care? why do i even care? what the fuck am i getting out of all this?

but i guess lately i have been getting back to basics and trying to re-find myself? could it be? i forget what song it was, but a song came on in a movie or something… i vaguely think it was the decemberists, but i don’t think it was. but either way… the feeling it gave me was a really comforting one… and it just made me think how long it has been since music has given me a feeling like that. for the half a year before the past month or two, i’ve just been robotically listening to music for the most part, with little care or concern of growth. but whatever that song was that came on… reminded me of how much i used to like music. i used to be one of those people that would turn on music the first second i got home — the first second i stepped into a room. that’s the kind of passion for music that got me into creating a magazine in the first place. i don’t know what made me lose that. i’m trying to find out.

but anyway. i’ve been going to a lot of concerts and drum n’ bass shows (well, not a LOT of drum n’ bass shows, but compared to my uh, 1 in the past two years before that, 2 in 2 months is definitely a lot). dieselboy is coming up as well on december 12th. sucks cause all of the concerts i want to go to are at these big ass fucking venues. so it costs a lot of money. but whatever in the fucking hell. it’s okay.

i got a new job at the snowboard connection, helping them do web marketing stuff. i’ll keep my comments minimal for now, but they are definitely pretty um, disorganized. i think i can add a lot of potential growth to their web status, but that all depends, i think…

i’ve also been working at volt doing game testing a bit and they owe me a fuckload of money. i switched my address and i haven’t really gotten anything mailed to me since. they owe me literally four paychecks (personally, i think it’s 5, although they claim otherwise). so… fuck. i also am owed a fuck load of money by lenny and through a bunch of other facets, so… godamnit.

going to las vegas this christmas with my family. that should be interesting. get to watch cirque du soleil’s “o,” so i’m happy about that. asides from that, though, i’m not so sure i really care for vegas. but we’ll see. maybe i’ll become a gambling monster, since i’ve only gambled once and it was really fun (only cause i won $20, though, i think).

blah blah blah.

finishing up a glossy sample issue for potential distributors of redefine. going to send it to the printer tomorrow after lagging for-fucking-ever. i’m really kind of disappointed with myself. but there are only so many hours in a day…

i’ve also been taking a bunch of classes — and by a bunch, i mean two — illustrator and flash classes at seattle central community college. so far, so good. i think they’re definitely helping. the LITTLE knowledge i have gained in both (i am 5 weeks behind in the illustrator class because it’s an online class, and i have only taken 2 classes of the flash class so far) has already been useful. so i can only imagine… it will all be very useful. i want to go back to school, or just take time away from work to study up. funny how before i got a job again i didn’t care to study up on those things. it barely even crossed my mind. but now it just feels so very necessary. teaching yourself is definitely limiting… so i know i have to learn more. i think right now i just know enough to get by. certainly not enough to make a difference. and that’s what i want.

i’ve also come to learn that although people say that women are the chuumps, men are definitely the chumps. it is evident in posa’s relationship with linh, in andy [crossett]’s relationship with vanessa, and in my brother’s relationship with roxanne. there are others as well. so therefore, my theory is flawless.

in other news, the time after college is definitely a strange one. everyone strays. i guess it’s only inevitable that people will continue to stray even more.

i went home a couple weeks ago and went to a lesbian bar with xinlei and her friends. it felt just like a normal bar, really. i had a couple drinks — completely paid for, which was nice… although weird cause i’d never met those people — and drove him kind of drunk. no more doing that. yet another reason not to drink, kids…

last month or so i started playing hardcore diablo 2 with lenny, lewis, alex [bennett], eddie [kang], and the like. it was actually addictively fun… i died a bunch of times and kept remaking, but finally i got a pretty dope crossbow (arbalest) on my assassin (i was an assassin every time… and damn, they are fun to play — i dunno why no one plays them) which kept me alive for a long time since assassin claws themselves suck ass. but yeah unfortunately, i decided to play when i knew i shouldn’t have in a level i had done like 20 times without a fucking problem, and then i died, and i was really godamn sad. and that is probably the most disappointed i’ve ever been in a game. and i refuse to reroll. everyone says that i’ll go back, but i definitely won’t. not for a year or so at least but lenny and i started playing diablo 1 lol and shit the butcher is hella hard. don’t remember him being that hard. but we haven’t played in a while — but it’ll come back soon!

lenny’s mom also got this really cute puppy who’s named taylor. lenny was saying she should name him clark since they have another dog named lewis. she was like, “HAHAHA, lewis and clark! wait, i don’t get it.” lawl, it was funny. she also scared me the other day because i was eating her cooking and she was like, “do you know how to cook that?” and i was like, “no,” and she was like, “don’t be so mean to me!” and i was like, “wtf?” (in my head, of course). and she was like, “don’t be so mean to me! treat me like your mom! if you want to learn how to cook something, tell me. lenny doesn’t love me, posa doesn’t love me, etc.” it was too much -___- that’s one main problem in my book to be honest. i was talking about this to jeanette when i went back a couple weeks ago. i don’t want another fucking asian parent. i already have two and they are ALREADY too much. i want a white family. damnit. or a really fucking cool asian one. but we all know how godamn rare that is. -___-

i really need to back up my journal forum thing. what if it explodes one day? then i’ll be really fucking sad. i need to do that… quick. so much to do, though… so little godamn time.

oh yeah, something i kind of forgot about… “the fountain” made me really kind of depressed. as is this book i’m reading, “paint it black,” by the lady who wrote “white oleander.” man… sigh. i’m such a closet romantic, and i worry that my romantic ideal fails to be matched…

the day i came back from california last week, it was snowing like a fucking bitch. oh and get this. i missed my flight on the way home, so i had to drive back by myself. i parked 3 nights, 9 hours at the airport parking. FUCKING $88!! GODAMNIT FUCKING SHIT MONKEYS ASSHOLES. that’s so much godamn money. it’s not even funny.

anyway, i’m going to TRY to start writing in here more often, but i’m not sure that will happen, especially seeing as to how this entry took me a half hour to write. but it’s pretty long, i guess. it sucks that i had to ban xanga. i’m scared to look at it, but there definitely is stuff on it that i’d like to back up or look at sometime. but maybe not for a while. hopefully xanga doesn’t explode anytime soon.

i need to finish downloading the brand new album from trask, not that i’ve even listened to the songs i do have yet.

btw swimming is good for you too. btw i should probably get a physical. btw i think i should get a mammogram as well. things seem to like to… grow on me.

maybe it’s time to quit. it’s 1:08 am.

btw. on a side note. people are truly fucked up.

btw. on a side note. i need toilet paper.

btw. on a side note. here’s a conversation with tony that just so happens to be below this journal entry i’m writing in notepad, so why not put it? it relates to toilet paper, after all.

what a sick ass, am i right?

btw. i really need to go snowboarding. especially since i didn’t go AT ALL last year. i hope josh [hwang] will go with me a bunch after he comes back from the military for xmas. he keeps telling me how he’s going to ‘rape me’ though. i think i’m scared.

and on that note, it’s sleepy time.

hopefully i don’t have a dream about my teeth falling out tonight. i’ve had three of those in the past, like, two weeks. they’re really fucking realistic feeling. i wake up thinking my teeth really are starting to fall out irl, and let me tell you, IT’S FUCKING FUCKING SCARY. the dream interpreters claim that means that you’ll be overflowing with wealth soon, but i’m not sure that’s proper. i hope it is, though. money would be nice right now.
(xinlei’s response:)
weird that you posted this yesterday and i decided to randomly check your page for the first time in like a year. we are on the same wavelength lady. anyway i think people don’t know what they would do because not everybody is as outspoken as you (or wouldn’t be in certain odd/uncomfortably situations). and that is why you are the bombdiggity lady.

i’m watching… n/a
i’m feeling… ok.

“it’s been a long time… i shouldn’t have left you… without a dope beat to step to.” mmm this needs updating, and today is the day.

so what’s new? mmm, a lot of things, really. moved to bellevue with lenny and andy [crossett]. it’s not bad. everyone thinks moving in with your bf is such a big deal. i don’t know… oddly enough to me it doesn’t really seem much like anything. it still feels about the same most of the time, lol. but i’m weird.

i’ve been reading andy’s haruki murakami book, “hard-boiled wonderland and the end of the world,” and it is amazing thus far. almost done with, so i hope the conclusion is a worthwhile one. definitely one of his better books i’ve read… right up there with “wind-up bird” if you ask me. very fantasmical. i enjoy.

time to recap the month…
august 28th or so — moved into new apartment. moving was a bitch, but at least we got to move in early
august 30th — i got stuck with moving out of our old apartment responsibilities lol. which was all fine and dandy but then i find out when i go there that there is a FUCKLOAD of stuff that needs throwing out aagh! and to my dismay: NO TRASHBAGS. luckily our neighbor who i have met once or twice lent me some trash bags and some awkward small talk also happened awrrghhhashh awkward small talk!! >_< also… plastic bags filled to the max required numerous trips down without plastic bags, since i only got two from them. and oh yeah knives in one of the plastic bags = stabbing mcstabbersons. but asides from that uh, it’s all good?
saturday, september 2nd — bumbershoot’s first day. hmm, what did i see, i barely even remember. oh yes. parked in queen anne cause that’s the best place to park for bumbershoot in my book — cheap / free and close! anyways, we were walking to the venue and two guys stopped lenny and i on the street asking if we knew who panic! at the disco was. from there they went on this rambling ramble about the music scene, with one younger guy (23? i think he was?) saying some shit about how the seattle music scene was changing because there were big hip-hop people like the blue scholars, bah bah bah, and bah bah bah, and his friend who was ten years older (or probably more than that) was arguing something else… it seemed like they weren’t even arguing about the same thing, but nonetheless, they were really into the shit, so whatever floats their freaking boats. yeaup. ended up giving them a copy of my mag and the older guy said he’d e-mail and that he thought it was cool / interesting and that he always wanted to get into writing, but that hasn’t happened yet!

anyway, onto the venue, mmm… started out by going towards the exhibition hall where there was a bitchy staffs person, and started to watch the thermals and was unimpressed, so we left. then we headed over to watch some film festival one reel thing, and that was pretty cool. it was like 8 short films… one was a failed pilot episode of some hbo show called “the pity card,” with zach galfinikas (or whatever) in it… it was really funny… then some thing about how this one type of squid hatches its eggs like stars (rather than burying them in the ground), and then there was this documentary spike lee made about al gore that was never publicized because someone democratic exnayed it, but it was really kind of amusing, and a few others i don’t quite remember so well… .. . hmm! time to consult lenny for a refresher: wallyball, playing volleyball with people at the united states and mexican border (hitting the volleyball over the fence). there was also another one where a guy gave away oranges and asked people if they were anyone’s favorite person, and it showed three different responses… iono.

after that we went to check out the rubber band dance group at some theatre and it was hip-hop mixed with ballet kind of thing. the northwest ballet people SUCKED. the first part of the rubber band dance group was awesome, one really cool thing with music by the rza or some wutang person, and another light-hearted one with very hawaiian-sounding music and lots of footwork (but not a lot of upper-body work), playing on the idea of a girl who bullies around a guy or something. i don’t remember. some really good stuff, though, except the piece they ended with was the lamest. why they did that, i’m not so sure.
monday, september 4th — i obviously don’t remember what happened on the 3rd, lol. on the 4th, went to bumbershoot again… free tickets, i mean, why the fuck not? it was my first time going. i think it’s well worth it, honestly… as long as you’re open to looking at more than just music. the other stuff balances it well, i think. anyways. went with lenny and jennifer [villaruz] — we were supposed to see metric before, so i thought, hey, we should see metric this time and i gave her a free ticket. i also had two extra tickets which i ended up selling (with the help of jenn) for $20 apiece. good shit. now to make up the other $200,000 i’ve lost from magazine printing lol! jk. le sighs. speaking of magazine printing, going to put together a mock glossy copy with low run distro of 30 and try to get distro deal… ingram distributors has expressed interest if they can see it in glossy format. they’re one of the biggest. the implications of that? i’m not so sure.

anyways, went there and saw copeland right away. they were… okay. kind of boring, to be honest. honestly, i don’t think i was expecting much better anyways. they were good for about 1/2 and then it was like, “god this hour is too long.” at least his voice got better. it started off really scratchy and out of pitch and bad. after that, we went went to go see go like hell in the EMP. nice venue; i think they remodeled it or something, cause it didn’t seem so nice when we went to see jimmy eat world there back in like, i dunno, shit, 2002 or something. damn, time flies by fast. anyways, go like hell was okay. their singer chick had an awesome raspy voice, but punk seriously bores me… one guy was wearing no pants and a thong. hot. after that, went to the main stage to see atmosphere. fucking boring, but it was cool how into it the crowd was… they were totally waving their arms in unison and oh yeah, a load of them freaking went there and waited like 3 hours in advance, wtf! so they basically went to bumbershoot to see one thing or something. crazy. hardc0re! extreme! atmosphere’s stuff was okay during the songs with live bands, but the others were whatevers. halfway thru atmosphere’s set, left to go see feist, and she wasn’t bad… talked a lot, though. i don’t really care if people talk… they are, after all, the artist, and they are more than just a robot, but these two chicks there with their husbands were downright livid. they were like, “she talks to much! i don’t want to be here!” one of them wanted to leave feist’s set halfway to go see metric, but her bf was like, “i want to stay here,” and she’s like, “BUT I HAVE NEEDS TO!” lol, it was amusing. anyway, halfway thru feist’s set, we left to see metric, and metric was SO GOOD. it is one of the only shows i’ve been to in seattle where the whole crowd was actually moving and dancing and into it. there was this one raver dude there who was totally full-fledged into it and dancing his ass off, and it was awesome. i think some people were making fun of him and he left, but i’m not entirely sure, actually. or maybe he THOUGHT people were making fun of him and left when they weren’t. shrug. it was fucking awesome, though, even if most of the songs they played were NOT songs i was familiar with, it was easy to get into it. go metric.

oh yes, i should mention that i got cut from my city of kent job. so uberly lame mclamers. basically… dea had told me that i could start full-time whenever i wanted, because sacha went out early. well, obviously, i took on some responsibilities i needed to finish up. she wasn’t supposed to be going out until late october, but instead, she went out the end of august. i was going to start full-time towards the middle of september, since i had planned to go home from september 6th to the 10th and we had decided that really early on when they worked up a schedule and forced me to stick to it, but nOo then the bitch is like, “we need someone full-time now, so peace…” and btw she didn’t say it to my face, arian from big fish told me. fucking lame ass shit, dude. i really think it’s cause vince was pushing to keep me around but then he got a better job and left, so she’s like whuteva, i don’t need to keep her around anymore. biatch. sOo yeah now i am looking for a job again… hoping to get a job @ evogear, so uh hopefully i hear back from them about the second interview soon? :/

le sighs. for now, i am doing some contract bullshit work for microsoft, some freelance crap, and working almost full-time at volt (for this week anyway), so we’ll see. at least i still have money coming in, lol, and big fish owes me 1k plus. so yeah. whuteva. bitches.

i’ve become a clotheshorse lately. how lame. is that what it’s come down to?!!!
tuesday, september 5th — went to a drum n’ bass show with tony [cordova] and yuki and nate [davis] showed up too! yay! good stuff. well, okay, let me rephrase: okay stuff. we went to see pendulum. not the biggest fan, i’ll be honest. couldn’t really get into their beats, but the war room was cool. haha tony and yuki went out to get some beer out of my car, and turns out they missed the end of the set without even knowing it. eediots. and we went to jack in the box afterwards and they were making some loud ass gay jokes in the car and the guy at the window was gay and then i was like sorry for the rowdiness, and he just shook his head. hukkkk. bOoOo so mean. anyways. yes, pendulum was just okay. hopefully aaron simpson & zacharia tag team this friday the 22nd will be much better. i can’t imagine that it wouldn’t. CAN’T WAIT. hopefully no one flakes out on me!

bleh so tired of talking to PR people!
wednesday, september 6th – went home… lenny had to leave work hella freaking early for it, but yeah. the initial trip — aka as soon as i got off the plane — was filled with buttloads of bitching about my clothes, my job, etc. — luckily, that subsided for the rest of the trip. surprisingly, actually. but yeah, went home, went to eat food, cause that’s what we do, and that’s that.
thursday, september 7th — went to sherry’s and hung around her house. didn’t do too much. went home and went to eat at some NASTY ASS FUCKING RESTAURANT. which my parents were raving about. but it was sOoOo not good — nothing had flavor. they soon came around and agreed with me. cause it was gross. man. went to go look @ phil’s cats. or maybe that was thursday, i don’t know. but they had these two little cats, cept now they are kind of full-grown, so it was not as exciting. one of them was like retarded and incapable of eating food, though — every time it ate food, it’d spit it out again and pick it up again and spit it out again (on accident). they feed their cats bread. WTF?
friday, september 8th — drove around the bay area taking photos of sushi restaurants — from oakland to alameda to hayward to san leandro to blah to san ramon… yeah. almost got the hook-up with a family friend’s restaurant of san ramon, but not enough time so that fell through. damnit… need tutorials T__T the number of visitors to sushimonsters has been declining. BAD. VERY BAD. it’s cause i’m the only asshole who works to get traffic. godamnit. anyway, at nighttime, went with dahye to xinlei’s house to play poker. lost ten bucks. shit i think i barely won any hands at all. it was quite pathetic, actually. a couple of xinlei’s friends were there, and she totally lives in the sticks of walnut creek. hella fucking far from the freeway, and she still pays more in rent than us in bellevue! yay! fuck the bay area. i can’t think of a reason to live there (minus friends maybe), really. maybe if i were blinging out of my ass.
saturday, september 9th — went to the winchester mystery house with xinlei, her bf matt, and sherry. it was uhhhh okay. not as exciting as i had remembered it to be. honestly? i think i confused some dream i had with reality or something, because i distinctly remembered this one area, but… it… didn’t exist. yeah. i am a freak HOOOO T_T anyways. i ordered some clothes from ebay. where the fuck are they! godamn my clotheshorseness! anyways, there was also this “behind the scenes tour” which was a couple bucks more, so we took it, and it was a little more exciting… showed us the basement and coal shoots and how the elevators worked and stuff… yeah. sherry said they should have had the behind the scenes take place first, and i think she is right! oh well, though. dude, they had an arcade there with fucking mario brothers arcade game, wtf? i played the simpsons arcade game… the side-scrolling one like double dragon type. speaking of video games… alex’s ex had all of his video game consoles when they broke up so uhh now they’re all hers. that just makes me mad :X i want a nintendo bad. T__T i rhyme. went home and ate dinner with family and roxanne, and after dinner, sherry and i went to the theatre to watch “little miss sunshine” — IT WAS FUCKING AWESOME, even if steve carrell didn’t play a huge noticeable role. very cool characters who made an outrageous plot believable.
sunday, september 10th — came home. la la la. think bought groceries @ the korean market near our house, paldo world. that place is weird. they don’t sell chicken. do koreans not eat chicken!!!! although, i can’t really think of where they use chicken, minus the fried chicken you see at some restaurants. DUN DUN DUN, THE MYSTERY QUESTION: DO KOREANS NOT EAT CHICKEN!?

in other news, i don’t remember much of what happened each day minus a couple things: someone made us a craft sushi monster. it’s fucking pimp!!!!!!!!!!!! i’ve started playing diablo 2 again, cause it’s good for you. we don’t have a table, so we need to go buy one tomorrow @ ikea. k i guess we’re going wednesday.

i don’t think i mentioned anywhere that some day in august, lenny, posa, linh, and i went to shota sushi & grill, and we got a huge ass platter of sashimi (disgusting) and what we wanted was a godamn video of the chef preparing something, but that didn’t happen. i did try every kind of fish though,and in conclusion: aji (spanish mackeral) is pretty good, but my favorite is sockeye salmon, which is apparently weird. but whuteva! at some point we also went to isami next to uwajimaya, and that place is fucking gross.

yupyup.
friday, september 15th — crossett rented some movie called “alice” (or “neco z alenky”) by a czech director, jan svankmajer. it was AMAZING. what was also amazing was a short that was on the dvd, “darkness light darkness”. it was a bunch of body parts coming together to form a person in a tiny room — a body made of clay. AWESOME. he’s like a surreal cinema guy, so his other work used puppets, props like animal skulls, and clay to get the idea across. AWESOME. right up my alley.

saturday, september 16th — watched the fucking ong-bak sequel movie, “the protector” with posa, linh, lenny, and alex. god. it had definitely one of the stupidest movie scenes i have ever seen. jeezus man. there’s this one part where all of these EXTREME!!!! people come out and start attacking him with rollerblades on and riding bikes towards him and at some point a fucking sand buggy tractor something or other thing. SO STUPID.
sunday, september 17th — yet another movie. “the sentinel” with michael douglas and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh eva longoria and uhhhhhhh that fool from 24. i forgot his name right now. blank. it was better than i’d expected, but those kind of stereotypical action flicks always get lost in memory after time goes on…

i’m watching… fresh prince of bel-air.
i’m feeling… ok yarrr!so i don’t even know where i am at anymore with dates really, but whatever.

friday, august 4th, 2006 — someone wrote on sushimonsters that momoya on kirkland was teh uber awesome so we went there as part of our anniversary celebration and it was pretty good… their cactus roll was quite yummy — has garlic in it and is rather spicy and is kind of good O__o

saturday, august 5th, 2006 — lenny and i went to ghost town and umm stuff! it was right outside of leavenworth, at a place called… what was it called, i don’t even remember anymore. oh yeah, it was blewett (i had to look it up). blewett was an old mining town. we couldn’t find it at first — all we found was a placard marking blewett as a historical site. lucky us, though, we saw this little creek/river, and there was a guy with a boat, and it was rigged up to individual baskets for panning for gold. so he told us to go across the street and that there wasn’t really much left. there really wasn’t. there was just a old stamping mill that was all crumpled up and exploded and you couldn’t even really tell what it was anymore. there were also three individual mines, one of which had a really steep insane slope down to the entrance. the other ones were fairly normal. unfortunately, we didn’t have a flashlight, so we couldn’t really go into it or anything, although there probably would have been an animal inside that’d maul our faces off. :0 anyway, then we basically came back and bought some weird candy around leavenworth.

tuesday, august 8th, 2006 — lenny and i’s one year anniversary. honestly, i don’t remember what happened. not much, i don’t think, since we did other stuff already. i made him a video. you can see it on youtube. but i’m not telling you how. but if you really want to know, you can tell me, and i might show you.

anyway, miscellaneous things in between… work sat me down (the city of kent) and had a talk because they felt like i was slacking on coming in and stuff, which i guess i was… and yeah. things are all good now. sushi monsters has been doing okay, been averaging 100 hits a day these past few days, which is pretty sweet. sent off the past few copies of redefine to distributors to see what they’d say — didn’t get an answer from some, but others said they’d be interested if it were just a normal 8.5″ x 11″ on glossy paper — which the last copy was not. sooo i’m going to spend a few hundred bucks and make that happen and send it out again, and chances are pretty good, i think, that we will get a distribution deal. from there, i’m not really fucking sure, but i’m just kind of going with the flow.

thursday, august 17th, 2006 — andy [crossett] and i went to look for apartments in bellevue and fucking aghhh we found the perfect freaking place, brand newly remodeled, new everything. i wanted to put down deposit. he said… how about we take our chances and don’t do it. and we didn’t. so we went to posa’s to look @ his apartment but the apartment people weren’t there, so we just hung around posa’s apartment for a while. we decided to go back and put down a deposit — too bad, the apartment was now taken. in a matter of half an hour or something. god fucking damnit, that place was seriously PERFECT. it was soooooo nice i’m really kind of annoyed when i think about it — that’s the last time i listen to someone else! we ended up finding a place not too far down, on 140th and 12th. it’s spanish-looking. i dunno, it seems alright. the bathrooms are new. which is cool. fantastic. getting out of here in a matter of days. cool.

friday, august 18th, 2006 — weee. so sherry was supposed to come up to go to oregon with andy and lenny and i, but unfortunately her flight got cancelled and they wouldn’t fucking even give her a discount on booking another ticket. honestly ridiculous poor hairy. her plans for the weekend were completely debunked. sooo we left for oregon a bit later than we had originally planned, which was as soon as sherry got here @ midnight. we ended up leaving @ 8 in the morning. went to our campground @ champoeg. missed the exit, and so we went to shop @ the outlets for a little bit. i bought a couple shirts and a pair of rocketdog shoes that totally rock ass. anyways, we left and headed onto the ghetto campground, with no really exciting trails or anything. they looked interesting on the website, but the website lied. i think the photos were taken during spring when all the flowers were in bloom. in summer — really not so exciting. anyways, after we got to the campground and checked in (around 2), we immediately left for the oregon coast. stopped by seaside, and the beach there was really unexciting, so we went to cannon beach which was 800,000x more exciting, 2x as big, and 1/2 as crowded. so it was totally awesome. we also brought a skimboard with us and so i learned to skim, and i think i have the hang of it for the most part. i can’t do it totally consistently, but about 75% of the time, i think… although when you get off the board and stop for a while and try to do it again, it feels a little awkward!! cannon beach is sooo very nice. pretty sand, pretty water, no seaweed, wtf. it’s really kind of weird. one of the nicest beaches i’ve gone to, i think, with the exception of thailand. way better than fucking gross ass northern california ughhh! after skimboarding and cannon beach and stuff we drove home, and along the way, stopped by this weird gas station with weird people that sold a lot of guns and knives and it was gross and had a weird vibe. but yeah… got home and went to bed. it was very late and dark by then — well not that late… probably about 10pm.

saturday, august 19th, 2006 — woke up at like 10 the next morning and went to portland to andy’s sister’s house. it was a nice ass apartment with really awesome furniture that she got ultra cheap. sat around for a while eating animal crackers and eventually she left, so we went swimming @ her apartamento complex. there was one weirdo guy who… was weird, but anyway, the pool was also odd. the deepest part was 4′ but generally it was 3′6 all around the pool. why that height, i’m not really sure. we swam for a while and they had community blow-up rafts, so that was fun! played marco polo for a while and i think i splashed water at random people at some point. but yeah, pools are always fun!!! i think i got a bit darker!!! after that, we drove to the cove palisades campground, which was pretty much in the middle of nowhere. we had to drive through the mountains to get there. people were scared! cause the sun was red and looked like it was bleeding and it looked like it was red because something was on fire. i’m still not really sure what the deal was, but it was weird. when we finally got there, that whole place smelled weird as shit too, every five feet or so when you got into the boonie little (zombie-infested) cities had a different kind of scent — probably because they planted buttloads of different crops there. earth2o water is located in culver there! that only has 700 people or so, lol. anyway, like four hours later or something, we got there, and it was kind of weird, it was like we were in arizona, with this giant canyon and shit. it was quite a trek down to even get to the campsite… basically it was across this little suspension bridge that connected two plateaus or something. it was weird! but we made it across and we had purchased salmon and scallops, and marshmellows that were never eaten, and andy had bought tofurkey sausages that he said tasted like sawdust. yeah! sawdust!!! we also bought potatoes and corn, because we were going to throw them into the campfire, but unfortunately, that camp was in such a dry area that they wouldn’t allow campfires so we could only use the portable coleman grill lenny bought. we could boil corn, but the potatoes could not be eaten, so they were not eaten. most unfortunate. but i cooked the scallops with butter and garlic salt and mmmmmm they were super good. the salmon was super good too yayyyyyyyyy yummy everything. nothing like eating phat feastings at a campground. lol. we went to bed shortly after eating although our neighbors were uber freaking loud. but whuteva. they were playing music up past 10pm and the camp people came and yelled at them and said that if they kept it up, they’d get ejected. unfortunately, they didn’t. oh well.

sunday, august 20th, 2006 — the next morning, we got up and went on a hike around the area. in ‘arizona,’ if you will. we saw two different types of lizards, blue-tailed skink and something else. the same two breeds were all over the freaking place. also saw a rabbit. and a squirrel pushing an egg that we thought was an out-of-the-norm animal egg, but it turned out to be just a chicken egg, and that was disappointing. also saw a bunch of different stupid spiders. at some point we went down the mountain trail to the water and saw some path along the side of a hill that hadn’t been traveled very much. no shit. i led the way and it was freaking spider web haven; i got spider webs all over the place (good thing they were thick ones… sick!!!) so finally lenny took the path and even then we decided there was too many and turned around. seemed like we were going into the unknown anyways… on the way back (well, and to), we tried to catch lizards but to no avail — them bitches is fast! finally we left the campground and started to head back. a ghost town was supposedly on the way, but the highway entrance to that highway was really poorly marked. we drove well past a gas station when we decided to go back and talk to the people there, and they said, “yeah, we get 100 people a day asking us how to get to 97 cause they’ve missed it. it’s very poorly marked.” the reason we were going to take 97 was because i wanted to stop by shaniko ghost town on the way. shaniko was such a joke. on some ghost town website it was labeled top 10 ghost town in the united states. it is a ghost town no longer, although the old buildings are still there. the people in the town have turned it into a tourist attraction — with museums and corny attractions. nothing much really costs money, which was cool, cause most everything was on a donation basis. but basides that, it was kind of a creepy little tourist trap town run by senior citizens who weren’t really that friendly. there was a sheriff, however, wearing the traditional wild west sheriff garb, carrying a shotgun, and that was kind of interesting. people kept firing off shotguns too, with blanks. interesting. but not what i had wanted. i think my love affair with ghost towns has exploded. sigh. ghost towns (or former ghost towns) with highways running through them are no freakin thx. bitches. anyway, after that, we drove back, and it took quite a while to get home, but finally we made it. yupyup. so concludes our oregon trip. on the way back, i took some rockin videos of lenny singing and dancing to things like britney spears’ “toxic,” and it was freaking awesome. heehee.

lately andy and i have been the last ones left about the apartment (well, for the MOST part, although other people still have stuff here)… and so we’ve been basically bumming around the tv all day. the really stupid retarded part is arlen took all of the routers so andy and i had to SHARE the freaking internet cord (which you have to restart between switching computers every time — it’s so fucking stupid). but i think come wednesday internet will be disconnected, as will cable, so i’m not 100% sure what we’re going to do lol. we’ll see about this. well i guess we are ok to move in on sunday, but regardless of that, it still doesn’t really matter.

time to go. blahblah. my entries sure godamn suck now.

i’m listening to the cardigans.
i’m feeling (see title)

11:25pm — i shalt refrain from writing longer recap entries regarding the previous week unless i feel better by the end of this rant.

i’m watching… some weird video about reviving dead animal organs, i don’t know, blame lenny.
i’m feeling… alright. farm’s making good-smelling foods :0

thursday, july 14th — went with erin to drop off some magazines. went around pioneer square and decided to eat around the area — ran into some homeless guy who we bought some soup and bread for. anyways i asked him how long he had been on the streets, and he said… “you know what? in a six month period, my dad died, then my wife’s mom died, then my mom died, then my wife died… and my doctor knew that i was an alcoholic at the time and he put me on xanex and that spun me around.” and i asked him, “was the xanex worse than the alcohol?” and he said, “oh yeah. definitely.” he had graduated from uw and then graduated from law school, and then all that happened and he somehow ended up and stayed on the streets. he described how he worked for this black guy who got his face horribly burned when he was young, and now he’s the deputy mayor or something, which is crazy… it’s weird how fast life can spiral out of control i guess? anyways… he claimed he was looking for a shelter on 2nd and lenora but when i told him he could follow us there cause we were parked near there, he started talking about how he needed $4 to get home to puyallup instead — we didn’t give him money, though, just the food… (my original bread bowl i got for free because the guy who worked there said they were going to throw it out anyway). there was another homeless guy who came along who didn’t want bread when i offered it to him, then came back and said he wanted it, then when the homeless guy we had given the bread to ripped his bread in half, the guy who came back said nevermind rofls… crackhead.

oh yeah, that old guy — he was about 55 now, and very unhappy, clearly — at some point, he said, “you want to hear what’s really ridiculous?” and i said, “go for it!” and he laughed and said, “that’s cute. if i were only forty years younger…” lol. he kept saying, “i’m sorry. i know i must smell terrible.” “i know i must smell like a pig.” etc… :/ poor guy. he brought up how he had eaten a bag of cheetos two days previous TWO TIMES. of all the things to bring up… he must have been really hungry.

anyway, then we walked back to my car and my car had been towed. god. $180 including towing and ticket, then i had to come home and pay my vehicle registration for almost $90. hella lame. T__T at least i bought a sweatshirt for $20? at nordstrom rack? :/

anyways, since i haven’t written in here in so long… a lot has happened, i guess. for one, the most recent thing, the sushimonsters.com website is uppppp, hoorah.

tuesday, july 4th, 2006 — on fourth of july, i went to pomy’s bosses’ house with lenny and co. — the house was in puyallup and was right on the ocean — he pretty much had a fucking beach in his backyard. and he had a jet plane and a helicopter and this cool plane garage that, when you flipped the wall down, it looked like part of the house, so that was pretty cool. they had this giant ass weird-looking doggie, too. it was like you could ride it like a horse, but it wasn’t as monster as alex’s freaking horse doggie. THAT’S A HORSE. of course, of course. ANYWAY. the first night we had a buttload of crab lol. i felt out of place at first, but yeah… the younger cousins were the only ones who actually talked to me, but they were funny… lenny wasn’t helping either, though, because he wouldn’t even notice. i asked him if he wanted to play pool and he said ok, and we started playing, and then someone called him to go do something, so he left, and i thought he would come back, but he didn’t, and i was stuck with a bunch of little kids. and then everyone was made noodles in the morning and we (linh and i) weren’t, which is fine, but no one even asked… umm!!? that was just a little weird… linh and i were complaining also because all the guys got to do was fuck around and the girls had to be called into the kitchen to arrange dishes and shit… linh hates kitchen work i guess. i don’t particularly mind it, but i do mind the fact that guys don’t have to do anything. if guys had to do it too, then awesome. fun for everyone. but the fact that the guys just played with fireworks while the girls were slaving away in the kitchen and taking care of babies is not mybag of chips, no no. but the worst was the kayla (is that her name?) started bossing me around. oh man. she would tell me to pick things up for her, and hold shit for her, and follow her around because “she was the leader”. nega-fucking-tive. she was telling me to follow her, so i walked into a fuckload of shitty mud, and got my shoes all dirty, and then we went back and she said sorry, and then immediately said, well, i told you not to walk in it, but you didn’t listen. i was just like WTF. that’s gotta be some kind of… something. anyway, the first night, we had crab, and it was wooonderffulll. all you can eat crab, basically. i enjoyed. the second day was lots of time on the beach, watching people light fireworks and stuff. it was cool. that beach is crazy — you can just walk down and pick up oysters and more oysters! and that shit is expensive, but these people have it right in their backyards, omg~! we went on a canoe for a little while, but i only wore a t-shirt and was freezing my ass off. omg what’s gross — there’s this part of mud with just tons and tons of freaking sea snails GAG with these cony shells and the mud had super suction, and i didn’t know it at first, so i’d be walking walking walking and then get my shoe stuck and not know it and end up falling on some barnacles and trying to retrieve my shoe that was stuck in snail, OR stepping completely in muddy snail and trying desperately to get back over to barnacle. rofls. not funnnnn. so siiick. i talked to some other lady, and it turned out she had the same problem too ROFLS. so grossssssssss. anyways, i’ve never seen so many fireworks being lit off — all around the body of water, really. and just with the little kids constantly wanting to light fireworks… they were just all over the freaking place. i’m not going to lie — i don’t really see the appeal, but hey, whatever floats your boat. that day a bunch more people came (the previous day was essentially just lenny’s family) and lots of foooooood. and lots of fun conversation, INCLUDING QUOTING MITCH HEDBERGGGG! talk about making a person’s day. the one people seemed to like most (not quoted by me, but by paul) was “dogs are forever in the push-up position.” rofls. ahhh <3 mitch hedberg. anyway. fireworks that night were swell… they were actually the best i’ve seen, i think, even though the wiring got fucked up and well there were a lot of pauses, but it turned out beautiful and i’d say they were the most entertaining i’ve seen, cause they were more arranged in patterns, as opposed to just your regular boom here boom there boom everywhere, sky is filled, but no exciting patterns. if that makes sense. lenny took some nice photos, too. win to setting off your own fireworks. i think they bought like $500? worth of them, at least. that guy who lives there was like a fireworks freak and went to conventions and stuff. interesting.

sunday, july 2nd, 2006 — went with linh, lenny, and posa to some place in marysville where they sell fireworks. i couldn’t figure it out for the longest time cause on the way there, there were all of these wooden signs advertising shit. but they were just a name and a lot number, like #79. i didn’t get that at all, because when they said we were going to an indian reservation to buy fireworks, i thought… okay, it’s going to be one little booth on an indian reservation. NEGATIVE. it was a whole freaking area with like a hundred little shops, all selling slightly different selections of fireworks out of little wooden shacks. WTF?!!! lenny also got to eat taco truck for the first time, and i made him a fan!! well, the taco truck made him a fan, but my telling him to eat from a taco truck gave the taco truck the opportunity to make him a fan. THAT’S RIGHT!!!!! WEEEE. with all of the fireworks we bought, everyone was cheering as the four of us were walking by holding fireworks. lol. when we got back to lenny’s, we lit some off. I LIKE COLORED SMOKE BOMBS. those are way fucking cool. there were also these black snakes where you light a little small dot, smaller than a penny, and it grows into this snake-like thing. odd. i don’t see how it works. but yes. SMOKE BOMBSSSS!!!!

i THINK today was my last day at rubber stamp. the day before, david had taken me aside and basically said that he felt it wasn’t working out for them or me, and that the only reason i hadn’t been fired yet is because he thought that i was one of the people that the company could make a huge difference for. i begged to differ and quit. but he said some nice things and some things to think about — about how i am not meticulous enough — and i guess i have to see that. but that environment just wasn’t for me. i’m getting along fine in the kent place now even though they have fuckloads of directions and formalities because they are the city, but i don’t care, because i respect the people there. and i don’t mind listening to them about their analness. it’s alright. with rubber stamp, it just wasn’t… i do feel bad because i left them half-stride. i was going to give them two weeks, but he said he didn’t need it, so i gave them two days instead. but actually, i just checked out the frugalities.com website right now, and it seems like it looks way fooking better since after i left. they actually gave whoever is updating it creativity visually, where they had just wanted me to keep it exactly the same. so, it’s better. well, some things are better, and some things are worse. it’s weird, though, because they changed all the text and the formatting of the code and everything. what possessed this? i wonder. looks like the change was the best for everyone. good.

anyway, i think it’s pretty awful that i never write in this thing anymore… how sad… :[ i guess i just don’t have that much time for myself these days? i am too set on working to attempt to get somewhere else. then i’ll have all the time i want for myself? maybe?

- bab’aziz and wristcutters (06/04/06): today lenny and i went to watch the movie “bab’aziz: the prince contemplating his soul” and “wristcutters: a love story.” both were excellent films, both at the neptune, BUT!!!! the thing was that “bab’aziz” was playing off of a really scratched dvd, and we didn’t get to finish it… sucky. there was about 20 minutes left of the film before they stopped it. they even attempted to stop it and clean it off, but that didn’t work out either. we got free movie vouchers from it, but i would have liked to see the end. it was a cool movie… great cinematography, particularly considering the camera was not very good quality… and the sound synching when they were singing was a bit off, but it was interesting. it was primarily following around a grandpa and his granddaughter who were in the forest, and they were searching for a desert party with “dervishes” (i’m not sure what they are). the stories follow people around who they meet along the way, and it was cool. one particularly awesome story was when one character named oslam (or something) said that he accidentally dived into a well at some point and emerged in a castle. i dunno, it was cool. the only bad part about the movie was the acting of the little girl in the movie, but she was a little girl, so whatever. one part in particular was super trippy, when they got really close up to this singing lady, and it made me feel like i was high or something. lots of singing, and lots of GOOD singing. but yeah, that film started scratching really bad 3/5 of the way through, and we managed to get through 1/5 of the movie or so with a few scratches here and there, but in the end, it had to be stopped because it got so bad that the screen just froze entirely. too bad. :[ after that, lenny and i went to eat at thai65, cause there really isn’t that much stuff to eat on the ave, and my meal was pretty freaking yummy!!!!! but then we went home, i played some zuma and then took a nap, and back out we came for “wristcutters”… which is a black comedy about suicide and death. essentially, everyone who dies from suicide goes to this foreign land, and the main character kills himself via wristcutting, and he misses his ex-girlfriend a lot. basically, the suicide people world is exactly the same as reality, but a lot more bleak, because people are missing things and people from the normal world. essentially, this guy searches and searches along the way in that life for his ex-girlfriend, but she cannot be found, and when she finally is found, she had turned into a nut job. job from arrested development is in it as a cult leader, as well as the moosy guy from “e.r” (with a really bad austrian accent), and a few other celebrities, as well as very quirky characters who are most notable with their unique speaking patterns… a few retarded-sounding ones, a russian guy (who is a musician in the movie, but is a musician in real life as well, and they use his last album’s songs in the movie, and it just fits really awesomely), a mute lady, etc. both of the girlfriends of the main character are HOTTTTTTT, particularly the brown-haired one. the movie is pretty amusing in little, cynical ways, and the director was funny (he was there after the show) because he made all these parts that he thought no one would find funny, but everyone found them hysterical. lol. makes me wonder why he wrote those scenes in the first place. it was interesting to see the dynamics of the crowd — all the poeple who watched “bab’aziz” were older folk… late thirties or later… lenny and i were the only non-old people, and some guy sitting in the row behind us. some guy next to me also kept getting up to leave but then the movie would start again, so he’d sit back down… two times this happened, it wouldn’t have been funny if he had completely stood up, but his butt was just in the air both times when “wristcutters” came on, the age of the audience was extremely varied, and a lot of the younger crowd came… i’d say mostly around late 20s or something. wewt. anyway, i want to watch “nacho libre”… it looks rather amusing, even though it is from the director of “napoleon dynamite,” but he didn’t WRITE it — the “school of rock” guy did, so it might be OK.i dunno, i’m really kind of depresed lately… because everything is just so negative, i guess… hopefully it will get better. work is alright, i guess i’m getting more used to it, but i’m still going to look around for other positions, because well, i should. i’ve just been coding on this language they developed in-house lately, and it’s whatever, alright… alright, alright, alright. time goes by faster when you’re coding than when you’re doing graphic design, which is weird… working from home on fridays is awesome, however. too bad the language they developed functions exactly like PHP. if only it actually WERE PHP — then i could actually learn something U-S-E-F-U-L… -__-

hoping to launch the sushimonsters site by the end of the month, so that i can run an ad in redefine. why not, right? that’s the smart thing to do. it’s gonna be kick ass, i hope, i hope.

wow, i haven’t written in this thing since april 24th… that’s a fucking long time :0 i really have a lot i should probably do for redefine, but i just don’t feel like it… cruahhhshing… my soul.